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Productivity Roundtable Finds Nation’s Efficiency Hit Record Lows After David Pocock’s Shirtless Instagram Posts​


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The government’s productivity roundtable has shared that one of its key objectives for the three-day summit was to identify the precise reason for a record low in national productivity that occurred when Senator David Pocock went shirtless online.


Leading experts told the Economic Reform Roundtable that on late August 9, they observed a substantial drop in efficiency across Australia, where everyone in the country was rendered entirely useless for hours on end, capable of nothing but drooling over their phones.

Coincidentally, the only person in the country who wasn’t suddenly immobilised was ACT Senator David Pocock, who minutes before had shared a slew of what can only be described as “thirst traps” to his social media.

“Our data shows that workers stopped being productive the second they opened up their phones, like so, and saw Senator Pocock’s latest… Instagram… oh my God,” one economist tried to explain, before going slack-jawed.

The current theory held by respected experts is that the average human brain is incapable of observing the perfectly sculpted body of a 37-year-old Greek God without being overwhelmed by awe, lust, or jealousy.

“Once combined with the additional ‘And-He’s-A-Politician???’ factor, seeing David Pocock’s rock-hard deltoids is enough to send any reasonable person into a full cognitive shutdown,” a doctor warned.

Since the discovery of this health danger and productivity, Parliament has placed a censure on Pocock’s body entering the Upper House.

theshovel.com.au

Productivity Roundtable Finds Nation’s Efficiency Hit Record Lows After David Pocock’s Shirtless Instagram Posts — The Shovel

The government’s productivity roundtable has shared that one of its key objectives for the three-day summit was to identify the precise reason for a record low in national productivity that occurred when Senator David Pocock went shirtless online.
theshovel.com.au theshovel.com.au

9now.nine.com.au

Buff senator has no intention of turning into 'soft politician'

9now.nine.com.au 9now.nine.com.au
 
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next time you're visiting the Faroe Islands, these words may come up in conversation
Fjall . v. - to go to the hills to work among sheep
Skadahvalur . n. - whale meat sold at auction to defray the cost of boat damage
Vevlingur. n. - a cord worn around the sleeve when digging for puffins
 
After talking to a good mate on the phone yesterday, he is suffering with Influenza A, I now find myself with very similar symptoms.
That said I have to man up and get the weaner calves into the yards to be tagged for the upcoming trade sale at Muchea Selling Complex on Sept 8.
No sympathy from She Who is ever Wrong, got told just get on with it.
 
There is no need to ask me how delighted I am the Tax Office has informed me my calculated quarterly PAYG Installment is $8,220 in addition to the $16,500 I need to forward by March next year so I can meet my 2025 tax obligation.

Oh well, it's only money.
 
No need for the sad emoji @wayneL. I think the advice is rather funny since the one I received in July advised the calculated quarterly payment was $2,500. I'm only in the PAYG as my taxable income is high and the franking credit and foreign tax offset doesn't entirely cover the tax or Medicare levy. I could easily reduce my tax to zero by not having any income but that could make it slightly difficult to buy food I reckon.

Anyways, the ATO doesn't know what my actual holdings are. It only gets data and uses algorithms to project an estimated yield based on the previous tax return. It's out by a large margin, approximately 40%, for this quarter when using the installment rate rather than the estimated installment amount. Easily accommodated within my cash flow.
 
Bellcose said:
No need for the sad emoji @wayneL. I think the advice is rather funny since the one I received in July advised the calculated quarterly payment was $2,500. I'm only in the PAYG as my taxable income is high and the franking credit and foreign tax offset doesn't entirely cover the tax or Medicare levy. I could easily reduce my tax to zero by not having any income but that could make it slightly difficult to buy food I reckon.

Anyways, the ATO doesn't know what my actual holdings are. It only gets data and uses algorithms to project an estimated yield based on the previous tax return. It's out by a large margin, approximately 40%, for this quarter when using the installment rate rather than the estimated installment amount. Easily accommodated within my cash flow.
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I woulda smiled if they used it for good purpose, because then that money would have been used for the greater good.

But let's be honest, it isn't.
 

Moscovium​


Element with the atomic number of 115
Moscovium is a synthetic chemical element; it has symbol Mc and atomic number 115. It was first synthesized in 2003 by a joint team of Russian and American scientists at the Joint Institute for Nuclear Research in Dubna, Russia. In December 2015, it was recognized as one of four new elements by the Joint Working Party of international scientific bodies IUPAC and IUPAP. On 28 November 2016, it was officially named after the Moscow Oblast, in which the JINR is situated.
 
As of this morning 9,42am WST there is nothing of note or of any particular importance is worth reporting on from the back room of my abode.
 
Bellcose said:
That's awesome.

Strangely enough at 6:15 pm EST, it's dark outside at this location - Latitude: 35°17′35″S, Longitude: 149°07′37″E
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Were you going for a walk over the Waterloo Bridge over the Molonglo River, in Canberra, or driving?
It's always dark in Canberra.
 
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frugal.rock said:
Were you going for a walk over the Waterloo Bridge over the Molonglo River, in Canberra, or driving?
It's always dark in Canberra.
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The Dark and cold might be due to an impending credit downgrade.
From ABC News

Budget deficit and proportionally high debt sees ACT's credit rating downgraded to AA​

https://www.abc.net.au/news/charlotte-gore/13510528
S&P Global Ratings expects the ACT will incur large deficits after capital accounts, and its debt will be structurally higher than in the past. (ABC News)

In short:​

The ACT is equal worst with Victoria on the national credit ladder after a decision by S&P Global to reduce the territory's credit rating from AA+ to AA.
The group says the ACT has proportionally high debt relative to other Australian jurisdictions, and its budget is expected to remain in deficit until 2027.

What's next?​

Treasurer Chris Steel acknowledged the agency's rating, and says the budget is putting the territory on the right track.

The ACT's credit rating has been downgraded from AA+ to AA by international ratings agency S&P Global Ratings.
The group cited the territory's proportionally high debt relative to other Australian jurisdictions, and the likelihood the budget will remain in deficit until 2027.
S&P singled out the ACT's rising health costs and major infrastructure projects as factors contributing to its financial position.
The agency said it expected the territory's budget to return to a "slim operating surplus" in 2027, which would mark five operating deficits since 2022.
"An increase in capital spending, including for new projects added to the pipeline in the latest budget, is likely to push ACT's deficits after capital accounts above 10 per cent of total revenue over the next two years," S&P said.
"These weaker outcomes will also drive ACT's total tax-supported debt toward 200 per cent of operating revenue, well above our prior expectations."
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The treasurer says the budget is putting the territory on the right track.
But track to where? Insolvency?
Only a politician can come up with such garbage.
Mick
 
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