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Disintegration of men's mental health

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by moXJO, May 3, 2019.

  1. moXJO

    moXJO menace to society

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    Not sure whats going on at the moment.
    But a very large number of guys I know are having mental breakdowns or committing suicide. Its not age ( from 17-80) or region specific (all in Aus though). Its up to 3 suicides this year. And currently helping 7 guys in my immediate circle. But there are a lot more reaching out for help. I'm getting swamped, very stretched for time.

    Anyone else noticing or experiencing similar?

    It got like this late 80s early 90s but that was during the downturn.
     
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  2. Sdajii

    Sdajii Sdaji

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    Yep, a few people I know have developed suicidal ideation in the last 6 months or so, all men, and one went through with it about a month ago.

    Not sure how you can be unsure about what's going on; the media and social culture is continuously attacking men, particularly white men, making people think they are evil, if they talk about it they are mainsplaining or need to check their privilege. When Gillette brings out an ad literally saying men are bad and only some are even trying to be better than that (listen to the wording, it's literally the meaning of the words, not to mention the clear tone and message), anyone who says it's inappropriate is accused of being afflicted by toxic masculinity (this is just one example), all the while the rate of problems continues to rise and people say "Gee, I wonder what's causing it!"

    If you can't join the dots between "Culture demonises group x unfairly and imposes a cultural taboo on them saying anything about it" and "Group x has an increase in depression, mental health issues and suicide" it's a worry.

    But hey, I'm a straight, white man. I should probably hang my head in shame for not having killed myself yet or at least be considering it. Sorry for mansplaining.
     
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  3. Smurf1976

    Smurf1976

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    I've noticed it yes.

    I've also had confirmed by a credible source that what I had long thought might be the case in fact is true. Some of the more dramatic road "accidents" are suicides in practice. The sort of incidents where death is virtually certain - car with single occupant runs off road at high speed into a solid object or an oncoming truck and the driver isn't wearing a seat belt. Etc.

    I suspect at least some workplace incidents would likewise not be genuine accidents. Building sites, heavy industry, farming etc - I've got zero proof but it's certainly my thinking that some "accidents" are really suicides.

    The causes I think are multiple. The "political correctness" stuff is a factor but by no means the whole story. :2twocents
     
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  4. qldfrog

    qldfrog

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    This men hating campaign has also serious implication in job finding and career,and daily life
    If you are having marital or de facto problems, as a man you will loose everything, access to kids money etc
    In career, irrespective of your ability in the big corporate world, you will be replaced by any female somewhat remotely competent in the pursue of fairness quota, and all this in an economic situation which is far from the rosy pictures we are bombarded with.so no job prospect, no sentimental hope, no help, constant lashing..no wonder
     
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  5. basilio

    basilio

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    The issue of many single car "accidents" being suicides is well recognised. Workplace incidents not so much but certainly some coroner reports indicated the deceased was depressed and people can certainly make bad decisions in that head space.
     
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  6. moXJO

    moXJO menace to society

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    It's not just the anti-men campaign. As smurf said there are a few factors. Cost of living and having to constantly work is another.
     
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  7. qldfrog

    qldfrog

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    Yes economic situation is not great and worse for males
     
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  8. IFocus

    IFocus You are arguing with a Galah

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    Haven't noticed myself but not surprised, there is no down time any more peoples lives are frantic then throw in social media / internet with the negative aggressive behaviour, then watch the news where everything is sensationally ramped up to the max and so on it goes.
     
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  9. chiff

    chiff

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    After the depression in early 30s there were people that never recovered,thrown on the scrap heap and viewed themselves as worthless.Some never made it back into normal life or society and struggled on,sometimes until they died premature deaths in sad circumstances.They lived lonely lives without partners to care for them.I wonder if things have changed for some people.
     
  10. Ann

    Ann

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    As did the Vietnam war vets, so many good men scrapped by the do-gooder marching hippies who demonized them by marching in the streets waving anti-war placards. When these dear souls returned from a conscripted war they were demonized and shunned, leaving them with the horrors they could never speak about. My heart breaks for these dear men.
     
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  11. basilio

    basilio

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    Very, very true. Probably largely forgotten by now but the impact of the depression on a number of men and women was literally soul destroying.

    I do remember a particularly sad story about the children of (some) people who had lost all "soul" in the grind of the 1930's . It turned out they were totally incapable of providing love and care for the children they had and in fact in the 1950s a whole new generation of troubled and delinquent children were raised.
     
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  12. Ann

    Ann

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    In fact the 1950s, when I was born and raised was a very caring and community oriented time. It was a safe time, no-one locked their back doors, if mum was not home (unusual) the neighbour would feed you and entertain you until mum came home. In 1956 the rock and roll era came in and everyone got shocked with a gyrating hip. A lot of movies came out suggesting society was crumbling with a new generation of delinquents, nah, not really. Just a touch of journalistic bullsh!t to sell papers and movie tickets. :)

    Not that for one moment am I suggesting I am successful but every so often the TV is put on prior to watching a DVD or a selected Youtube documentary, I cannot believe the trash the viewing public is fed. I gave up watching the news years ago after being aware of the actual truth of a story and then seeing it being verbaled or twisted on a news report. The news has more fiction than Neighbours (I don't watch Neighbours but I think it is fiction). Sport...meh. It appears that Twitter/Facebook/whatever else can destroy your career so why would you? Most of us imbibe a little too much on the rare occasion and then head to Twitter....WHY? Thank goodness I have never joined twitter or FB. I can make a good enough fool of myself on ASF. At least I have Joe to ask please delete...:D
     
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  13. Sir Burr

    Sir Burr

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    Stopped sitting and watching the news on the box years ago. Somehow still pick-up enough here and there to know what's going on.
     
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  14. Smurf1976

    Smurf1976

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    With regard to the thread subject, well I do think the mainstream media has a lot to answer for.

    One problem is creating an impression of what constitutes a "normal" life that bears no resemblance to an actual normal life.

    Another is a particular media company which tends to constantly drum up pointless conflict of which "gender wars" is one and "age wars" is another that seems to be emerging.

    Anyone using the mainstream media as their point of reference will surely conclude that they're a failure. :2twocents
     
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  15. basilio

    basilio

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    I was bought up in the 50's too. So were probably most of the people on this forum.

    So?

    I wasn't saying all, most, or many of the people raised in the 50's had a disastrous upbringing. But I do know that there was a core of soul destroyed depression people whose children reflected the traumas the parents suffered 20 years earlier.:2twocents

    A sad part of these families was that they usually had many children almost all of whom suffered from this neglect. You actually don't need a large number of really unsettled children to create some social havoc. The Housing commission estates of Heidelberg and Broadmeadows were particularly notorious for these situations.
     
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  16. Smurf1976

    Smurf1976

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    In the context of adults I've certainly seen it where a serial bully affects multiple others and some of those individuals then start engaging in similar behaviour towards their own family, friends or even animals. So there does seem to be a "contagious" aspect to that sort of thing.

    I'm also aware of situations where "breaking" others mentally was intentional on the part of those doing it for their own gain. Sad but true. :2twocents
     
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  17. moXJO

    moXJO menace to society

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    Another thing that I'm not sure is cause or effect, is the inability to handle problems.
    Possibly the end result of depression where they just stop doing everything. Won't even open the mail in case its a bill or something. Stop answering the phone won't go to work etc.
    Beyond the personal toll on family, community and friends- I wonder about the impact on the wider economy?
     
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  18. basilio

    basilio

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    The paralysis that comes with and/or causes depression is well recognised.
    The effect on the wider economy ? Obviously substantial in terms of health costs, loss of productivity and so on.
    Unfortunately one might do the sort of the analysis that the tobacco industry did on the cost benefits of smoking and come up with a positive outcome for the government. (really.:( )

    Your introductory post is the most important point. The emotional struggles of men and women and children seem to be expanding. The impact is awful on them and their friends and community. Finding ways to tackle these issues is critical. Attempting to do it all on a one to one basis is overwhelming.:2twocents
     
  19. Smurf1976

    Smurf1976

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    Just my observation having seen a few people go through this stuff that a common theme has been some element of disillusionment that what they expected to happen under a given circumstance hasn't actually occurred and clearly isn't going to.

    That point, where they realise the supports they assumed where there aren't really there at all, seems to tip many over the edge.

    Eg they've realised that their marriage / defacto relationship never really was based on anything solid and they've been living a lie right from the start.

    Eg the law's been broken, that's beyond all doubt, but nobody's going to hand out punishment or even enforce the law from now on.

    Eg they realised that whoever they thought was on their side versus whatever was in fact the one undermining them the whole time right from the start.

    And so on.

    A sudden realisation that was was always taken as true is in fact false seems to be a common theme.
     
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  20. Ann

    Ann

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    ....and it takes them a long time to regain their self esteem and trust after the separation. If something is said to them and it can be taken two ways, they opt for the negative.
    To bring them back takes time, patience and understanding. It is so sad to see the damage people can do to others.
     
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