One of Life's Mysteries Solved......
Who is Jack Schitt ???
Many people are at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt". Now we can intellectually handle the situation. Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt & O. ****t.
Awe Schitt the fertiliser magnate married O Schitt the owner of Needeep N.Schitt Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and the deeply religious couple produced 6 children. Holle Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, & the twins Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents objections , Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After 15 years marriage Jack & Noe Schitt divorced, Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock & because her children were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She became Noe Schitt Sherlock. Meanwhile Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt & they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt.
Of the 6 children, Fulla Schitt & Giva Schitt, were inseparable in childhood & subsequently married the Happens Bros in a dual ceremony. The nuptial announcement in the papers reported the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg,Byrd,& Hoarse. Bull Schitt the Prodigal son left home to travel the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new bride,Pisa Schitt. So now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt" You can correct them.
Family history recorded by Crock O. Schitt.